Sex is one pursuit in life that you can always improve. There is always something new to try and explore, and this is what makes it so exciting. The problem is that many of us fall into bad habits that can have a negative impact on our sexual pleasure.
Sex mistakes we all make
From letting your sex life fall into a rut to failing to speak up for yourself, here are just some of the things we’re all guilty of in the bedroom. But don’t worry, each mistake has an easy remedy!
Failing to say what you want
It’s easy to fall into a routine and settle for boring sex if you’re too afraid to have a conversation about what you really want. Talking about sex doesn’t come easily to everyone, but there are huge benefits to getting over your hangups and talking about what you want in the bedroom. If you’re not sure how to get started, try these simple conversation starters.
Skipping the lube
People often assume that lube is for older people, but this couldn’t be further from the case. If you regularly use toys or just want to enjoy a more pleasurable ride, lube is the way to go. There are so many different lube options available that it’s something you can afford to experiment with. From flavoured lube to delaying lube, you’re missing out if you skip this step.
Not washing your toys
Cleanliness is vital when it comes to sex toys. A quick rinse in the sink isn’t really sufficient if you want to keep your sex toys in good shape. Relying on an antibacterial soap can also lead to a build-up of residue and some rather unpleasant breakdown of the materials. Check your toys when you buy them to find out how to keep them clean and then always wash them before and after use.
Using any old condom
Condoms which have been subject to changing temperatures or bashed around are much more likely to break. So, reaching for that ancient condom in your wallet is a bad plan. Keep your condoms in your bedside table and don’t be afraid to toss it if you’re concerned it’s too old.
Using alcohol as foreplay
Alcohol can help to loosen you up, but it’s also more likely to make you want to make foolish mistakes like skipping the condom or not washing toys when you switch between holes. Try to keep a clear head before sex, particularly if it’s with a new partner.
Failing to discuss the history
Many couples wait a few months together before deciding to forego the condoms and rely on the pill for protection. This is often fine, but only if you’ve had a serious conversation about your sexual history. Don’t be afraid to ask the serious questions as it could prevent you from contracting an STD.
Not getting tested frequently
Like the above mistake, many couples stop getting tested once they are in a monogamous relationship. Some STDs have no telltale signs, so your partner telling you they are clean might not be enough to reassure you. Always gets tested after you have had unprotected sex to ensure you don’t contact anything.
Foreplay can often feel like it’s stealing the limelight, but this is actually a great way to build intimacy in your relationship. Focus on pleasure and nothing else and you will soon learn how your partner responds to every lick, tickle and nibble.
Making it a race
Unless you agree to a quickie, then there’s no reason to treat sex like a race. Focus on the time spent together instead of just trying to reach the finish line. If you struggle to keep things going for a while, there are plenty of options for delays which will help you to last longer.
It’s easy to fall into a rut when you’re in a relationship. If your partner has started to anticipate your next move then it might be time to think about switching up your routine. Invest in a new toy or try a new game in the bedroom. You’ll soon see the benefits when you get to surprise your partner with something new and unexpected.