If you’ve ever caught sight of a neighbour undressing and wished you could’ve seen more, you might have a voyeurism kink. This is a desire to watch people undress or engage in sexual acts, often without their knowledge. While this would be considered a crime, there are ways you can indulge your voyeurism kink in a consensual way.
Voyeurism comes from the French word voyeur, which means to watch. It’s a kink related to watching another person engage in sexual acts, but not actually be involved. There is the voyeur, who does the watching, and the performer (or performers) who engage in the act.
While some claim that it’s a kink, and whole categories of free-to-access porn would have you believe that it’s a harmless kink, it isn’t really. It is technically a psychosexual disorder which requires treatment. It’s seen in both men and women, but is more common in men.
This type of interest often sets in before the age of 15 and might be the result of a sexual trigger in adolescence. There is no known cause of voyeurism, but it is thought to stem from an accidental experience watching someone undress which leads to a sexual trigger.
Voyeurism can be a compulsion, or it may be an isolated incident. And while voyeurs are not typically thought to be dangerous, if they are caught out, there is the risk they could act in a way that would remove the threat of being revealed.
You don’t have to become a peeping tom to enjoy a spot of voyeurism, particularly if you are in a committed and adventurous relationship. You could ask your partner to pleasure themselves with the understanding that you will be watching from somewhere. You could also attend a sex party where you can watch other couples engaging in sexual acts, or be the performers.
If you like the idea of watching and not being observed, then there are ways to make this happen within a consenting sexual relationship. However, it’s important to be cautious about how far you are taking this and if you are feeding something that could become out of control in the future.
Yes, it can be. The issue with voyeurism as a kink is that it often requires an unsuspecting subject. And this is illegal. It can be easy to remove the onus of responsibility from yourself by watching voyeuristic porn (and there is plenty out there) but it’s difficult to know if this has been made convincingly by consenting adults, or if there has been an illegal act at play.
If you are concerned that your kink has become unmanageable, then it’s time to get help. The first step is admitting that you have an issue. Therapy is often recommended to help you to get to the bottom of your sexual interest and unpick the root cause of your voyeurism. You can then look for healthier, alternative outlets to achieve sexual gratification.